Facebook drama…still

A while back I wrote an article called Why I’m quitting Facebook…sort of. I wrote then about EdgeRank, the algorithm that Facebook uses to control what you see on your timeline. What I’ve come to realize since I wrote the article is that Facebook basically is just a bunch of drama. Drama that I do not find necessary so much in my life. And so for that reason my intention is to spend a lot less time on Facebook and have a lot less clutter on my Facebook page. A lot less clutter and a lot less drama.

I have had people say on a couple of occasions recently that all I do is post stuff on Facebook to brag and just show off all the different things that I do and how successful I am. They say “Oh you go to all of these shows and events and go out to fancy dinners all of the time and you get a new car and all you do is post on Facebook and rub it in our face.” I can not believe that I hear this sort of stuff. People have no idea how many sacrifices I have made over the years to be able to do the things that I do now. And even more so than that is the amount of sacrifices Brenna has made. I chose not to have children for a reason. I have chosen to work crappy jobs and crappy hours over the years as stepping stones to something better these days. It is not my fault if someone else has kids or is too old or too tired or whatever other reason they have for not enjoying their life. People see us posting pictures of a vacation that we go on. But what they do not realize is that vacation was provided to us by the hotel. Yes that’s true. The hotel gave us their ‘Super Suite’ and gave us a meal and some spending money in exchange for us posting on social media about how cool the hotel was. Yes, that is part of the deal. What people don’t see is that on that particular vacation, Brenna was working online in our room at 1AM to make one of her deadlines. People do not see the fact that I have so many friends in the entertainment industry that a lot of times they will give me tickets to their show in exchange for helping to promote the show on different social media sites. Yes, free tickets in exchange for promotion.

When I first moved to Las Vegas, a girl told me that the town is run on comps and compliments. A comp is a complementary item such as a ticket to a show or event or a drink or a meal given to someone in exchange for something of value in the future. Casinos give out comp drinks to anybody gambling in exchange for that person to stay there and gamble longer. Casinos often give us free show tickets in the expectation that we will tell everybody what a great time we had at the show. Hotels give people free rooms from time to time. So a lot of the things that you see me do are things that I don’t even pay for. As well there are certain organizations that you can buy memberships to and as a benefit of the membership they will give out tickets to shows for seats that need to be filled in the audience. This is a really great deal in that you can pay a small up front fee and get tickets to many different events during the course of the year. Yet people see this as me just showing off.

I had two people ask to borrow money recently and when I refused I had one of them tell me how selfish I was and how I have more than enough that a few bucks would not kill me. Thing is I don’t lend anything to anyone. Especially money. It is in my manifesto.

we all have problems the wolf of wall street facebook drama problems swezey

It is not like I don’t have problems of my own. I just choose not to post them all over Facebook and other social media sites. I get how that may give the impression that everything is hunky-dory and some may see it as dishonest or such but really, who wants to hear about this or that problem of mine? It is more fun to write about fun stuff. If someone sees that as bragging or showing off, well, I can not help them.

Then there are people that post things on my Facebook page that are sort of offensive and I can’t be having that either. Brenna always says, “Is that the brand that you want people to think you represent?” Coming straight from the mouth of a Graphic Designer. Even though my page is mostly set to ‘private’ there are still ways for The Man to see things on my page. If your setting is ‘friends of friends’ then who really knows how far that reach is? Perhaps Duff Goldman is a friend of one of my friends and if he sees something on my page… There goes that dream.

I also find my Facebook page filled with people that I have “collected” over the years. Just because you and I may have gone to school together or our paths crossed sometime back in 2009 does not necessarily make us friends.

So for this and other reasons, I have decided to take a big step back from Facebook. I would really like to quit it entirely except for the fact that the whole world is basically on Facebook. I do spend a lot more time on Twitter and I’m starting to spend more time on Instagram as well. And I’m trying to figure out if Google+ is a viable option and worth my time. But since I am not 100% interested to step away entirely from Facebook what I am going to do for the time being is dramatically cut back my posting on Facebook. Some will say “Oh well, if people do not like what they see then they can just stop looking at your page.” Problem is they will keep looking and since I can not control the little voices in their heads… I just do not see the point in adding fuel to the fire. So I will stop posting pictures of concerts and shows and dinners and outing and all the fun stuff I do. If you were living vicariously through me, sorry. Get out of the house and make your own fun. I will however continue to post the Question of the Day and stuff that I think is interesting like news about Solar City and Space X. So if you are into that sort of stuff feel free to stick around my drama free zone.

As of this writing I have close to 400 “friends” on Facebook. Many of which I have not spoken to in ages. Occasionally I will spy someone on my friends list and I do not even know who they are. Why are they even there? I have no clue. There are people in my friends list that I only communicate with through Facebook so another reason I need to stay on Facebook is to stay in touch with those folks. So, I’m going to go through and delete a large number of individuals. During that process I may accidentally delete someone that I shouldn’t have. If you feel like I have possibly accidentally deleted you, please do not be offended. Save the drama for your momma. Just send me a friends request. It was probably a mistake. Facebook does not make it all that easy to delete people and although I have found a loop hole that makes it easier, I still may delete someone by mistake.

So we’ll see how this works out and we’ll go from there.

We can all use a lot less drama in our lives right?

What are you doing to avoid or lessen the amount of drama in your life?
Let me know in the comments. Would love to hear about what you are doing.

jesus says drama queens should delete themselves from my facebook

 

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50 Replies to “Facebook drama…still”

  1. The funny thing is that we’re not connected on Facebook. lol The other funny thing is that you’re kind of realizing who your real friends are and who’s just trying to use or abuse you. True friends would never put you down for good things; that kind of jealousy never shows up in my stream. Sorry you’re dealing with that mess.
    Mitch Mitchell recently posted…Social Media Can’t Be Your Only MarketingMy Profile

  2. I’m in the process of doing the same thing. I’ve had enough. BTW… I love seeing all your pictures of where you’ve been and what your doing! I think its cool!

  3. I’ve always enjoyed your postings of going to Vegas shows and touring around Nevada. I’ve done alot of that myself, including front row seats for Tom Jones, so I like to see that exciting action. It’s inspirering. I’m surprised some people don’t like to see it. This is a well written and heart-felt posting. I think, even though you are backing off of facebook, you should stay on as it’s an important freelancer tool.

  4. Just one of many issues with Facebook. It’s often the case with some of my friends, (i use the term loosely) that they post so much trash that it’s like they are a different person. Only for the fact that i do actually know and see some of them (a lot are just from high school) that i know they are not like that at all. If i were to judge a lot of them by what i see on Facebook i definitely wouldn’t be friends with them lol. And i can’t stand people who try and put you down, especially where positive and successful stuff are concerned. Quite frankly i haven’t got time for people like that, and is exactly the reason why i cut them out of my life years ago. Keep doing what you are doing and filter out the garbage lol.
    Leanne Berry recently posted…Awesome £300 slots signup bonusMy Profile

  5. There is a thin line between showing off on facebook and celebrating milestones achieved in life. People come from far and I think its always a good thing to give your self a pat on the back and be grateful for having what you have.. So go on share it with the worls

  6. Technology just makes it hard to communicate with individuals over and chat for a while.This has its advantages over geographic locations but not good for those around .Its good to have a chat on a 1 on 1 basis.i.e. physically Its very important

  7. Good thing i have 5000 friend but i use mine for marketing purposes. Advertising and use FB groups also for this. In a way it helps me make money through this at the same time get news too.

    • Marketing for The University of Nairobi? That’s cool. How is that working out? Pretty well I imagine.
      Facebook is the way to go for marketing I thing. Instagram would work very well for you too. Just post a daily picture of the campus or a smiling student or staff. I bet you are already doing this though. (Is Instagram popular in Nairobi? I have not used social media in any other country than USA so I have no clue. Please excuse my ignorance.)
      Troy S. recently posted…#854 The escalator gets you going placesMy Profile

  8. Awesome piece—- “When I first moved to Las Vegas, a girl told me that the town is run on comps and compliments. A comp is a complementary item such as a ticket to a show or event or a drink or a meal given to someone in exchange for something of value in the future. Casinos give out comp drinks to anybody gambling in exchange for that person to stay there and gamble longer. Casinos often give us free show tickets in the expectation that we will tell everybody what a great time we had at the show. Hotels give people free rooms from time to time. So a lot of the things that you see me do are things that I don’t even pay for. As well there are certain organizations that you can buy memberships to and as a benefit of the membership they will give out tickets to shows for seats that need to be filled in the audience. This is a really great deal in that you can pay a small up front fee and get tickets to many different events during the course of the year. Yet people see this as me just showing off.”

  9. Well said …. “Man to see things on my page. If your setting is ‘friends of friends’ then who really knows how far that reach is? Perhaps Duff Goldman is a friend of one of my friends and if he sees something on my page… There goes that dream.”

  10. Facebook is addicting! For some people, Facebook can be as habit-forming as cigarettes! Facebook is a useful and helpful tool, but it becomes harmful if you begin wasting your valuable time. This is the site’s biggest disadvantage, because the loss of your precious time can lead to other problems.

    • Of course it happens every where. When ever you have people or sides or groups where there are differences, there will be drama. Think about it… when someone you know does something really awesome, like graduates from University or something, the person who does not have such the nice thing may develop a jealousy. Along with that there may be some ‘trash talking’. Drama is everywhere. The trick is to just not get involved in it.
      Troy S. recently posted…#844 The Stanley Cup runneth over with smilesMy Profile

  11. Awesome post, this is really a amazing post and very helpfull. Most of people are addicted of Facebook and cant even live without Facebook. This is really annoying. They looses all of their work juat because of Facebook. They should really block Facebook on their computer or mobile or they can use time look so that they can only be able to use Facebook one hour in a day.
    Thank you 🙂
    Hemant Kumar Arya recently posted…Deactivate Facebook Account And Reactivate.My Profile

  12. It’s not really easy handling all the things these people post. Most time, they just need to be ignored as most of them are just there because they’ve got not much else to do outside Facebook. So I will most likely just ignore them. You definitely won’t see any person who is working towards getting their life in good shape saying on Facebook for so long (except those who work with Facebook in one way or the other) let alone poking into someone’s life as such.
    Chenden recently posted…MIDI Controller VS Keyboard – A Complete TutorialMy Profile

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  14. Awesome post, this is really a amazing post and very helpfull. Most of people are addicted of Facebook and cant even live without Facebook. This is really annoying. But it is still my favorite waste of time. Facebook can be a lot of fun 🙂

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